Sunday, February 11, 2007

Under Siege

When I was shopping over Christmas, I saw that different stars' movie collections were being sold in the DVD section, such as Clint Eastwood and Elizabeth Taylor collections. They were packed with five or six of the best movies of each actor. Well, next to some of the other collections, there was the Steven Seagal Collection. Wow. Does anyone really need more than one Steven Seagal movie? Even just one of his movies might be pushing it. But if you do have the one, are the others really all that different? It's a guy who is supposed to be awesome at fighting but moves relatively slowly, he is attacked by a bunch of henchmen with limited martial arts skills (albeit one guy at a time), and he saves a chick or something, and he displays acting skills that normally wouldn't land a kid a supporting role in a middle school play. They gave this guy his own "collection"? Are you kidding me? You are going to buy all six of his "best" movies? Who are you?!! Your brain should be studied in an institution when you die to figure out what went wrong. I can't believe you just bought the Best of Seagal.

1 comment:

Tar Heel Tiger said...

when was the last time, or even the first time, you saw Seegal go after someone? He's such a big doofus all he can do is stand in one spot and let the villains come at him. How come no one ever just pulled out a gun. There's no way Seegal could dodge a bullet a la Neo.

I'm going back to HABOTN now.